Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Stuck

When your project manager asks you to put gangsta rap on the iPod, it's probably not going to be a good day. When he needs a little old school NWA to get in the right mood to respond to an email, the job just isn't going well.

Stuck is really the best way to describe my mood lately. My friend Amy just got a great new job after being with the same company for almost ten years. She's really excited about moving, new opportunities, and all that jazz. I'm really happy for her, and a little jealous. I've been with this job for better than ten years, basically all my adult life, and I'm feeling stuck.

I like my job. don't get me wrong. It beats the hell outta digging ditches, and they pay me well, so it's way better than most things I could hope for, but after ten years, I'm at pretty much the top of my field, advancement-wise. I'm middle management, with no real prospects for any other jumps in pay grade or promotion, so I'm stuck. At 33, I've reached my own glass ceiling. Brilliant.

So what do you do when you get stuck? How do I get unstuck? I'm not exactly ready to chuck it all and live in a van down by the river and try to get by on my poker and writing income. Good thing, since I can't really survive on $.75/month. So I'm not sure what I'm gonna do, or how I'm gonna keep motivating myself, but at least for a little while I'm just that guy, punching a clock at the office to get to leave and go do the fun things after work and on weekends. Which isn't a terrible life. I guess it bears a striking resemblance to what most people do. It's just not real thrilling, and the prospect of being in my same position in the same place for the next 20 years or so is kinda chilling.